I want to start today’s piece with an apology for not publishing last week. Some days are hard and other times, life doesn’t afford us the grace of writing the way I would love to. I do not take you all for granted and I appreciate everyone for being part of this community.
One of the beautiful things about the possibilities of the internet is the interconnectedness it affords us. It’s now easier to make friends today than it was a few years ago when our experiences were limited to only folks within our physical communities or schools. This has, yet, come with different dynamics and challenges of its own. Today, I will like to share emerging patterns I have been observing, a couple of which we can sometimes find ourselves doing.
Exaggerated realities
“There are less than 100 people remaining in Nigeria, everybody is japaing”. While the palpable fear of the future of Nigeria cast doubt in many minds, it is important to be grounded in the reality that only a few people would be able to relocate to another country. Same way, only a few people earn more than 1 million nairas annual salary, and none of this is your fault. When the desirable is not available, the available becomes desirable. It is very important that we do not limit the act of doing life to an imaginary relocation or when we reach a certain income bracket. To those relocating, we wish you the best. Channeling our discontentment to productive pursuit should not make us discount that life will never be the same for all of us. Make yourself happy while you are here.
It is very important that we do not limit the act of doing life to an imaginary relocation.
Unhealthy pressure to grow and do too much
The blurred divide on the internet is gradually making us discount the realities of life and how unbalanced it is. Peer pressure and hyper-competitiveness are taking away our individuality. Many people in my age group today are being diagnosed with hypertension and diseases associated with old age in the past. It’s like we are forgetting what growth is, and are supercharged to hit the gold in our 20s. It should bother you how much you are always tired at the end of every day. Self-assessment of our stress factors is important and we need to slow down a bit. I thought I got life figured out when I turned 25 but now at 30, I am completely taken aback at how much it is I still don’t know. It is fine to slow down.
Obsession with money
We are becoming super-driven by the act of making money, that we forget what it means to build genuine friendship and companionship, live a healthy life and maintain a balance between our work life and personal life. It is everything we are monetizing. I ask myself; when will it stop? While it is good to have a high expectation of oneself, it is equally important that we pace ourselves in a healthy manner. It will be suicidal to continue to benchmark our life goals in our 20s with people that are in their 40s and 50s. It is absolutely normal to not be able to afford things like a car just yet. There is really no fun in being in a hurry to succeed.
Speculative trading and investing
Related to the above point; hunting for a 20x returns portfolio oftentimes result in losing more money because the core fundamentals of how to build wealth evade us. The act of building wealth is a careful process that is devoid of luck. What you will consider as luck is years of unseen preparation that are not glamorous. Crypto speculation and hunting for moonshot is a less optimal way to make money. I do hope that instead of checking Binance every minute, we spend the time to study the underlying fundamentals of blockchain and equip ourselves for better opportunities.
Self-promotion and unnecessary positioning
While self-promotion is good, masking it with fake-it-till-you-make-it can be damaging. To those who see life as a journey, the best experience is at every moment of it. You need to know what hunger means to understand the blessings of good food. The excitement about every milestone we achieve only lasts a few days before the new reality of another race commences. It is important to be confident in oneself and face our insecurities without playing a status game. Please, make no mistake, you can show up in whatever way you want, just endeavour to be true to yourself.
Been a timeline and insta stories junkie can mask the divides in our realities, and create unhealthy assumptions about life. Thus, understanding the context of different realities and slowing down a bit might be all we need to live well. I hope you find this beneficial. Wishing you a beautiful week.
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It is fine to slow down.
I needed this😪
After reaching my lowest this year
I decided to suspend my Instagram account and just breathe😓